South Philly Review

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Despite Craig LaBan’s recent lukewarm review, people are flocking to Talula’s Garden like gaggles of Canadian geese. On my visit, the garden and dining rooms were filled with well-heeled middle-aged and older Center City couples as well as men and women in their late 30s to early 40s and a few business people who came in for a drink.


I invited my friend chef Christopher Thames to dine with me at the much-hyped Talula’s Garden, which is owned by Aimee Oxely and business partner Stephen Starr.


The dining room is awash in soothing warm colors. I sat on a comfortable banquette. Our waitress poured Schuylkill punch into small dark glass tumblers, and I ordered a Rob Roy ($12.50), which was nicely mixed and served in a pretty cocktail glass. Christopher wanted iced tea but the only kind served is a sweetened green tea.


House-smoked sturgeon rillette with mustard toast, crème fraiche and a petit herb salad ($12) should have taken me to my childhood when Jewish delis sliced to order smoked sturgeon, but this version was done as a rillette. The only type I’ve eaten was made with pork. Still, this was a good dish. 


“It is the type of dish you would find in any Paris bistro prepared by the hands of a commis,” Christopher said.


Our next appetizer did not fare as well. Chilled peekytoe crab and Maine lobster salad with tomatoes and hot paprika screamed for salt and acid. Seafood requires some kind of acid be it lemon, lime or blood orange juice — anything that would give the fish a much-needed kick. The protein portion was tiny, the tomatoes tasted of summer but the dish lacked heat from hot paprika. The baguette croutons were perfect, however.


I wanted a glass of red wine to enhance the muscovy duck I ordered for dinner. I ordered a glass of Côtes du Rhône ($13). 


The dinner then went south. Talula’s Garden’s runners never knew who ordered which dish. When a woman brought out each dish, she rattled off each ingredient on each plate. This is truly unprofessional and extremely annoying. This is a posh, fairly expensive place so I kindly told her to place our entrées on the table and leave us to our conversation.


Muscovy duck breast and foie gras with confit of leg parcel, beet greens and smoked beets ($28) was underwhelming and pitifully tiny. I still need to forage for a small microscope.


“The breast of duck is dry and I would describe it as the size of an obese quail egg,” Christopher said.


I adore foie gras and the amount on the plate was about the size of a fat garlic clove. All I got was a sliver so Christopher moseyed his fork around to find a hidden bit. 


“The confit is poorly executed,” my friend said. “It tastes like leftover pulled pork from a barbecue.” 


I took a bite and agreed with him. I could not have described this lame excuse for duck confit any better.


Marinated halibut with oxtail stuffed vegetables, sea beans and saffron ($28) made me want to weep. There was about four ounces of overcooked, under-seasoned halibut on the plate. I love sea beans, also known as glass worts, but, alas, there were just three small slender ones included in this dish. We did not think the artichokes with the oxtail was a fine match in this dish. Christopher discovered a squiggle of basil oil under the fish only after we ate it.


Dessert was the only star of the evening. It was a blueberry gateau ($8) but it was not a cake. It consisted of a thin buttery shortbread cookie topped with a citrus chibouste, fresh fragrant blueberries and a small dollop of créme fraiche ice cream.


Coffee and tea are $4 each.


Service was amateur and chatty. 


The original chef left sometime in late July, so I called the restaurant to discover the name of the executive chef. I was told I had to speak with the owner to get the name of the one in charge. I left my name and telephone number but the call was never returned.


One-and-a-half tips of the toque to Talula’s Garden. SPR